Tom and I decided quite recently that as we both like walking that it was time that we'd do something that would raise our game so to speak. So we decided that by October we'd try and walk the Hadrian's Wall Path all the way from Wallsend to Bowness on Solway. Yesterday we started it! We walked about 9 miles from Wallsend to Scotswood Bridge(which is just past the Metro Centre) and it was a fantastic day. That said, we were so tired when we got back that we went to sleep at 10.20 and didn't even to bother watching the Comedy Map of Britain(which has been a fixture for a couple of weekends).

Unfortunately as we didn't take our cameras I thought I'd use a couple of pictures I've found on a certain internet search engine to illustrate what we walked past. If you're not interested in anything related to Newcastle the cut is quite image heavy, so you make up your own minds.

In other news I went to the library on the way back from Sacriston today and decided to go folky for a week. So I've got the Alan Hull anthology, the best of Show of Hands(one of Tom's friends wants him to play a Show of Hands song at her wedding in August, I've not heard any of their material at all) and "Front Parlour Ballads" by Richard Thompson(who I do know and like).

Judith
x

Today's plan runs thusly:

Get up before midday
Have breakfast
Listen to the Holy Trinity of Tom Waits albums (Swordfishtrombones, Rain Dogs, Franks Wild Years) and finish all my work for bastard Ofsted

Right.  I'm on this shit.

Ofsted is an acronym, malappropriated as a noun.  It is also used as a verb - my school is getting Ofstedded (that looks wrong, but then it should) on Monday.  When it is used as a verb, it is only ever said in a negative context.

I can only compare this to the word "fist".

It's nearly half term.  I'm so tired it feels like my eyes are bleeding all the time.  Maybe they are.  I've done a hell of a lot in the past few weeks though.  Triumph number one has been getting English Literature back on the curriculum.  This is a big thing.  So I'm teaching An Inspector Calls when the inspectors come calling next week.  I hope they a: appreciate the irony and b: don't think I'm a bellend-supreme for doing that.

Also, I went to see Nick Cave.  I'd suggest it might be a bad thing, because I don't think I'll ever see anything quite so good ever again.  In other gig news, the Phlegm Fatales nearly got barred from a bar in Southport last night.  Our definitions of "20 minute set" differed greatly, and management took a dim view of proceedings when we carried on making a big pile of noise after they told us to stop.  Amusingly enough, it was a battle of the bands, and the judges put us through anyway.  Victory!

Right, work to do.

Despite still being laid low being ill i applied for two jobs today. First time applying for me so it is a big thing. One is based just down the road in Staveley and is as a Sales and Marketing Assistant for a recently opened Council Healthy Living Centre. The other one is worryingly close to Mansfield at Shirebrook at the Headquarters of Mike Ashley's Sports Direct group and is a Marketing Assistant role specialising in Brand Liason. Doubt i will get interviews for either as i have no experience but i have emphasised that what i lack in experience i make up for in bright new ideas.

Gone back to Clowne again as Lavinia got a last minute shift tomorrow and she was tired tonight so wanted an early night which isn't possible when i'm ill so i've gone home.

I'm just amusing myself by putting some final touches on a covers album i'm doing of electro-instrumental covers of pop songs. If anyone has any songs they want doing i'll see if i can oblige!

Take Care of yourselves,
Love furbaggles x

Would you rather be:

A courageous fool

or

A dignified coward

And by fool I really mean lonely, inarticulate, disrespected, embarassed, stigmatised, maybe laughed at, and seen as plain weird.
And by dignified I really mean nobody's mind is touched by you.

And by courageous I mean you might never achieve what you set out to do
And by coward I mean you might be haunted by never even trying.

Which would you be?

I need to know by tomorrow.

Today was all meetings. ALL meetings. I got nothing done. We've been working with this organisation called Iniva - the home of what N calls the 'Blackerati' (he can say things like that, he's a POC) - which has a strong history but is also pretty problematic in a lot of people's minds for encouraging both ethnic essentialism, or more lately, an internalisation of otherness - even on a very academic level - and an adherence to nineties type identity debates. Anyway, Mahmoud's residency is tied to them (NOT my choice), and seeing as how he's the funniest and brainiest artist I've worked with in a long time, he's already completely onto their case.

Not only that, but the curator who is working on their side is the laziest, most entitled frigging cow I've ever spoken to. It's weird because on a social level, I really like her. She's brilliant. But to work with - why is she even in her job? They're supposed to be supporting his residency, and everything he needs support with is like the BIGGEST pain. Basically he's getting nothing from them that a member of the public couldn't get. For example, we were talking about this quite simple event - his main project for the residency. It just needs an evite sending and a basic AV setup. Here's a summary of our conversation.

Me: Can we rig up a second projector? I can bring one from Gasworks.
Teresa: Well, we'd have to hire a technician for that.
Me: No you wouldn't. I can set it up.
Teresa: Well, it's tricky. There are cables and everything.
Me: Yes. We have cables too. IT'S NOT ROCKET SCIENCE YOU DUMB BITCH
Teresa: Well, but also we have to get a technician because sometimes presentations made on a mac aren't compatible with PCs
Me: WHUT. Ok, we'll make sure he makes it PC compatible.
Teresa: and the projector image we already have is too big to allow room for another projection on the wall.
Me: OH MY GOD. That's ok, it's easy to adjust the image size.
Teresa: But this is a really big projector. Very big and ex-pen-sive. You can't possibly know how to deal with it.
Me: I AM GOING TO KILL YOU WITH MY DEATH EYES
Teresa: And a technician is going to cost you £75 by the way.
Me: I promise you. A technician is not necessary.
Teresa: Plus, the speakers that are in there may come down after the show ends two days before.
Me: On the basis that you have an event, can they possibly stay up just for two more days? WOULD THAT MAKE SENSE?
Teresa: Well, I suppose I'll have to check and ask them.
Me: YES. YES. DO THAT. If not, I can happily bring some of our speakers. They're identical. And if you need to take down the wiring and the amps, I can bring those too.
Teresa: But... installing a basic AV setup is a feat unknown to humankind! Nobody has done it before!
Me: YOUR SOUL HISSES AND SPITS AS IT DIES IN THE DEATH GAZE
Teresa: Let's talk about marketing.
Me: So Mahmoud's had a design done and can send you the html for emailing. You just need to adapt it a little to Iniva's branding.
Teresa: Yes, well. What you need to understand is that somebody's got to DO this stuff, and it's probably going to be me.
Me: BECAUSE WHERE I WORK THERE ARE SPECIAL FAIRIES WHO DO THE WORK INSTEAD

Why do they bother opening Iniva to the public at all, when it would be easier just to keep the place closed?

And this is just on a practical level. Iniva's a brainy place. Mahmoud hasn't had an ounce of curatorial support on his project from them; they're not interested what the hell he does. I'm the one who's been talking it over, which is what I'm happy to do because, you know, I like art.

The only upside to this is that Mahmoud thinks the sun shines out of my arse. I love him and he loves me. he's such a star. And he's a good person to know, because he co-runs the most interesting organisation in Egypt.

Then a meeting about another artist from Cameroon. Then a meeting about marketing. Then a meeting about archives (this is very cool). Then a meeting about budgets.

One nice thing though, I'm writing two catalogue texts on past visiting artists Hamra and Zeeshan. I was worried at first as they asked me to write on things I don't like, but I wrote back with alternative suggestions that for me had more integrity and they came back saying 'ok'. Which is great, and it's a little bit of money. Plus, I'm assisting the editing of a media art reader this summer. It's only a tiny fee, but seeing as how I had volunteered to do it for free, it's a bonus. I'm dying to get editorial experience with a long-term aim of working for an art magazine. And I might be paid to write for a curatorial website this summer a little too - waiting for more news on that. Finally, I've proposed a feature for Frieze - but I've heard nothing so I think I have to give up on that one.

Ugh, i have been unbelievably ill for the last two days which is annoying as i thought i had just finished uni finally and had some beloved time off to rest before starting the inevitable job search. Not only did i get ill but found out i hadn't finished uni as i have a Viva on the 22nd for my dissertation and then have to produce a poster or some shit to promote my dissertation at the degree show which is apparently 20% of the marks - What the fuck! How am i going to make a poster that basically tells people that my dissertations says 1) People are still going to be buying CD's for at least another 10 years and b) the digital download market won't mature until there is 80% computer literacy coupled with a similar amount of internet access. Gah. I'm bored as Lavinia has gone back to work today and i am stuck in Clowne feeling like crap so i'm going to be fashionably late with that meme jobby that has been going round!

Three Things You Want To Do Before You Die:
1.) Have my music used in a TV or Movie soundtrack
2.) Play football at Saltergate
3.) Watch Bruce Springsteen Live

Three Names You Go By:
1.) Furbag
2.) Mr F
3.) Furbag Vialli

Three Screen Names You Have Had:
1.) Furbag
2.) Furbaggio
3.) Furbaggles

Three Physical Things You Like About Yourself:
1.) legs
2.) eyes
3.) feet

Three Things That Scare You:
1.) Anything bad ever happening to Lavinia
2.) That's it really!
3.)

Three Of Your Everyday Essentials:
1.) Maccy - My Laptop
2.) Music
3.) Football News

Three Things You Are Wearing Right Now:
1.) My P-Jimmys which is pjimmy trousers and a manics top
2.)
3.)

Three Of Your Favorite Bands/Musical Artists:
1.) Manic Street Preachers
2.) Pet Shop Boys
3.) Dire Straits

Three Of Your Favorite Songs:
1.) Where do you think you're going - Dire Straits
2.) We're the Pet Shop Boys - My Robot Friend
3.) Spirit in the night - Bruce Springsteen

Three Things You Want In A Relationship:
1.) I have everything i want and anything i would want later will come later (such as Kids)
2.)
3.)

Two Truths And A Lie (in no particular order):
1.) I am the best registered goalkeeper in Clowne ever since Pavel Srnicek moved out
2.) My worst nightmare is to wake up and be in Mansfield
3.) I am a registered homosexual

Three Physical Things About The Preferred Sex That Appeal To You:
1.) Being Lavinia :D
2.)
3.)

Three Of Your Favorite Hobbies:
1.) Writing/Recording Music
2.) Video Games
3.) Football

Three Things You Want To Do Really Badly Right Now:
1.) Play some football
2.) Eat - i've had fuck all for two days and i want some GRUB!
3.) Talk to Lavinia

Three Careers You're Considering/You've Considered:
1.) Writing soundtrack music
2.) Postman
3.) Marketing Exec

Three Places You Want To Go On Vacation:
1.) America
2.) Berlin
3.) Iceland

Three Ways That You Are Stereotypically A Girl:
1.) I listen to a lot of pop music
2.) I have a squeaky voice.
3.) Erm, i enjoy the company of animals?

Three Ways That You Are Stereotypically A Boy:
1) I have a great deal of facial hair
2) I am unbelievably messy
3) In my dreams i am Bruce Springsteen

The Getting Up at a Sensible Adult Hour project is going along smoothly, like 45% of the time at the minute. Wowzer. I got up and had coffee and browsed my emails and had a shower this morning, and still got into work on time.

Freecycling is going well also. People are so unfriendly though, they can't wait to disappear again. Doesn't anyone want to stay for a natter? Apparently not. Every time I shut the door I feel like Amelie. I'd also quite like to have mad freecycle sex. Like the bloke who came round the other night and took four cookery books and a mirror, he was gorgeous. I might just advertise for it directly. 'OFFERED: sex, N6'.

i've noticed something good about graffitti on London Underground: if you graffitti something, chances are they'll take it away. So, for example the 'return to the Playboy mansion' poster at Euston has gone, because some sterling folks from Object stuck some stickers on it. The advert for god knows what, but which canonises John and Yoko on the Northern Line has gone, because I wrote 'wife beater' on John's forehead. The breast enhancement ads at Christmas went after someone stuck 'You are normal, this is not' on them. Graffitti is like a fast-track, grassroots Advertising Standards Agency.

Oh, look! I took pictures of myself for no reason other than vanity. My hair has been growing out from v short to a nice bob:

Ok, flist. If you don't at least think about whether or not you can/want to do this, you're basically a crap person.

Key vote on abortion time limit this Tuesday 20th May - last chance to email or phone your MP!

From Abortion Rights:
'The Second Reading of the Human Fertilisation and Embryology Bill took place on Monday night in the House of Commons [the UK first debating chamber in Parliament]. Already, the anti-abortionists have tabled a number of amendments to restrict women's access to safe, legal abortion. These include amendments to lower the abortion time limit to 12,14,16,18 and 20 weeks; introduce delays and impose US-style compulsory briefings for women about foetal development; and to restrict the grounds for abortion. Further amendments are expected.

MPs are telling us that hearing from constituents is hugely influential. If you haven't already, please take two minutes to send an email to your MP or phone them up.



Ok, I did this earlier today. I already wrote to my MP in January, and got a letter back saying she supports no change in the law, which is excellent. So I decided to take the telephone route (I had no idea you can just call 'em up at Parliament!) and got to speak to her secretary. Obvously as my MP is already supporting women's right to choose, so I used it more as an opportunity to impress the value of the situation to her constituents rather than to persuade anyone of anything. If you ask them to make a note of your call, they'll put it on a database, which at least puts numeric and documented evidence of the importance of the issue to voters.

Please note that the independent medical studies this vote will respond to found NO - that means NO - medical, ethical or other reason to limit current levels of access to abortion. None.

Anyone in the UK, do it! Anyone who used to be in the UK, do it! Anyone who knows someone in the UK, forward this link: http://www.abortionrights.org.uk/

Thanks feminists and pro-feminists. please xpost as much as possible

Carrot salad can get ridiculously expensive. I've just made a massive load for the house:

Serves 6

grate 6 carrots
add cider vinegar and olive oil to taste
add a pack of pumpkin seeds (those ridiculously small supermarket-portion-sized ones)
add half a pack of pine nuts (same)
a bag of sprouting seeds (Co-op has an amazing introductory offer for 99p bags of this stuff - sprouting chick peas, split lentils and beanspouts - get 'em while they're cheap)
anything else you fancy, really - chopped spring onions, halved cherry toms, etc.

stuff face.

Flatmate Kitty has her reflexologist in her bedroom and I swear she sounds like she's having sex. Now, given that Kitty is the most happily-paired-straight-girl-sensible-mum-type among us (the carrot recipe is hers), I can't imagine her actually having a noisy lesbian foot-fetish affair in her bedroom. But that's what it sounds like. In general, she does make very good, very sexy sex noises (unfortunately and involuntarily, I hear them). They're obviously exactly the same as her 'oh my feet' noises. So maybe all those times I've heard her and Gavin at it, he's just been massaging her corns or something.

I'd quite like to be able to make sexy sex noises like Kitty.

I am supposed to be freecycling tonight and no-one has shown up yet. Damn those freeloading bastards.

God, we sound like a frigging hippy commune. Sprouting beans, reflexology, sex noises, freecycling? I need a McDonald's.

so.. we have some what-do-students-do-on-their-computers theme night with students and parents tonight
which means I don't have to be at work until 4pm

my plan was to grade programming tests
and then I originally thought to watch house tomorrow... swedish telly shows house tonight... it's Half-Wit.. it's a good episode, that'd do..I thought

so I woke up this morning, had breakfast, waited while new house episode downloaded and watched it

i'm crap at keeping promises to myself
but it's the first of the 2-part season finale.. it's been all these talks about how good it will be for weeks

and... you don't watch house because it's strange to see hugh laurie with an american accent?
seriously?! (*glares at kathryn*)
that's not a good enough reason

this one was.. omg.. so good... so very very good
even with all the excitement and expectancies
just.. omg
just just.. wow
yes yes.. I know a cliffhanger until next week...*waits*

expansive, isn't it? i am afraid you photographers are not going to enjoy the next half an hour, or however long it takes you to wipe the tears away and cease the jowl wobbling howls of laughter, because i went out armed with a camera today to a large forest and i still cannot keep a camera still when i am pushing the button. (changed to bold to highlight innuendo, or if you so wish, you can imagine me booming out those three words in a tyrannical voice). rather like... well we won't go there. let's have another photo shall we? i call this one: octopussy




i decided on that title, because that is what it reminded me of.. a sprawling octopus lunging at me with multiple appendages. there will be no jokes at the expense of ex-girlfriends here. i wandered lonely as a line from wordsworth (dorothy or william, the cynic vs the poet), taking in the sights, smells and most of all the noises of a large forest close to my village, my ears delirious to the sound of a thousand buzzes. i parked my car in a lonely layby and left the well beaten path, preferring to trip over mischevious tree roots than to interact with the semi-naked dog walking public. i only wish i had remembered to button my flies before i left the house, thus making my encounter with four young mothers (emerging from thick shrubbery with gaping, laughing flies) slightly less incriminating. at best, i suppose they supposed that i was in the business of supposing a tree would appreciate my urine. but then i haven't had an embarressing encounter like that for a while, so it has been long overdue.




don't bother looking for my penis in this one. i had sorted myself out by now.

expansive, but not limitless though. for as much as i tried to lose myself in this vast fauna, blind to the leaves for all the trees, my unnaturally bad sense of direction appeared to have invested in a compass, ordinance survey map and mercedes benz satellite navigation - all routes seemed to lead to the edge of the forest, a footpath or my car. despite these efforts to fight my homing instinct, i was able to sit and have a good, hard

think about things that have been happening recently. i am almost certainly going to be fired from my job, but i am past caring about such matters. what i am more concerned with is the future, whether it be getting a job that i have applied for working for a local paper (leighton buzzard is never going to have seemed so exciting - the home counties is crying out for.. er.. gonzo journalism), and other, more city-dwelling london based jobs. the problem, and i have expressed this to various people and on here i believe, is that my personality (....) is split 50/50 between two very different people. it's the darling buds of may in a bare knuckle boxing match with the glam and the sham of london, featuring withnail and marwood as referees. half of me loves the idea of living in a big city, and i mean properly, not living half an hour away from it on the train. half of me loves the nightlife, the feel of the city itself, the peculiar magic, stumbling in camden town signing vegetables for strangers and being offered drugs at six in the morning on the tottenham court road, kissing australians on holiday and dancing with achingly pretentious fringes and scarves. half of me absolutely wants to embrace that with open arms, write some terrible books about substance abuse and then fall beneath an underground train. sorted. brilliant. love it.


but then, the other half of me really loves this...








i don't pretend you'll have the answers. i don't even think you care all that much, and those that do.. well, i'm sure it will have all been forgotten once you have scrolled down to your next entry on your friends list.

(i make no apologies for those photos being uncut by the way.. if your computer can't handle it - tough)

sex! i feel like talking about sex, whilst we are broadcasting from some sort of morality bubble. sex is a silly business really, a ridiculous affair of squelching and noises that you usually hear on the farmyard. i don't know.. perhaps i am not qualified to talk about such matters, being (as i was) completely celibate for fifteen years until i lost my virginity in a remarkably brief encounter that lasted about as long as it has taken you to read this sentence. it has become a very mechanical process lately; i have been getting to know someone recently and seeing parts of them that her mother probably hasn't seen since she was a small child. not a relationship, obviously, because i haven't taken complete leave of my senses, but more a duty bound fuck, climb on board, let's get this out of the way because i really can't be bothered with it anymore and thank god that's over, now we can sit and be human beings and embrace and submerge ourselves in the awful post-coital silence of two people who are using each other as masturbatory tools and nothing more. i am doubtless, in her eyes, a pair of fingers and she probably sees herself as a gripping fist. it isn't a nice situation to be in, i look forlornly when my phone lights up with a message from her and i know, whatever her promises of just wanting a bit of company, it is going to end up in a sticky, humping, lukewarm mess and i never say no, partially because i want it but mostly because i don't want her to know that i hate it.

i'm actually quite disgusted with myself, but in a daily mail constantly thinking up excuses sort of way. i'm really appallingly disgusted with someone else much closer to me that is tearing me apart, but that is probably for another entry, another time.


on a happier note, car boot sales are fantastic for bargains. especially viola's that become available when the previous owner.. well.. dies.






i have the rest of the week off work. and clearly, i have a lot of things to think about. so in the meantime, whilst my brain is working overtime, i shall leave the last word to my shoes.



it must be so easy to be a foot.

Hi LJ, how's it going?

I suddenly feel unaccountably happy. The the last hormonal whiff of nitpicking, morosity (a word? who knows?), and self-pity produced by my period has gone, that's why. And also, I've just had a lovely weekend in Berlin.

The cunting Xbox 360 has decided to die again, for the third time! I really cannot afford to pay to get it re-modified if Xbox send me another one back again. So pissed off. It is the last thing i need right now. I had finally finished some work so i could play GTA 4 before i start serious revision for the 3 hour exam on monday and the cunting bastard twat commits proverbial digital suicide. AAAAAGGHH!

Love Furbaggles x

ah! sun! =)
ah! 25 degrees! =)
ah! everything lovely! =)

I as meant to be fulfilling a lifelong dream and playing at Saltergate tomorrow but it's been canceled. I'd put myself through two weeks of hell trying to sort out a team and money arrangements so we could do it and I was told this afternoon after waiting by the phone for ages that it was canceled as there weren't enough teams. Gutted doesn't cover it, Saltergate is going to be knocked down next year and i don't think i'm ever going to get to play on there. :( It might seem sad to most people and even other people who are interested in football, but to me that would be better than playing at Wembley.

Love Furbaggles
x

House:	I'm Dr. House. I don't believe we've met.
Dr. Conway:	Dr. Jamie Conway. I've heard your name.
House:	Most people have. It's also a noun

what to say?
I'm so tired.. so very very tired
longest day at work, where I needed to think think think think for all but the 20 mins lunch I had
and I should finish computer laboration
I should revise for course
I should prepare lots of stuff for next week
and I'm so tired I can barely keep my eyes opened

yes I'm off to bed
don't really have anything until 3pm tomorrow.. but should get about around 6am anyway, so i can get started on all that stuff I need to do
*sigh*

watched the new house episode from Monday night
and I liked it
season 4's been weird.. too little normal episodes so when one comes along I get happy :)

Went to Glapwell football club today to see basically a Chesterfield legends 11 take on a Mansfield select 11. Peter Beardsley, one of my heroes was the star attraction turning out for Town. Went there, paid my 3 hard earned pounds and watched 90 minutes of football waiting for Beardo with no avail. They then apologised after the game and said he had a puncture on the motorway half an hour before kick off. So why the hell did they announce him in the line up at kick off! Nobheads!

Love Furbaggles x